Single Parenting

If I remember correctly, when I was married I didn’t think about it all the time. Oh, maybe that was one of the problems.  I didn’t traverse my day thinking about the fact that I had a husband and what it meant to have a supposed life long partner, the hazards and helpfullness of it all, the inherent good and the obvious pitfalls.

But as a single parent, I think all the time about what I don’t have. I don’t have a partner. Sort of by choice, but really not. I am overwhelmed almost every moment of every day with the fact that I’m in it on my own, and that no one really understands. It colors every part of my world and has made me view things completely differently than ever before.

I am trying to break out of the shell of being so single-minded. I don’t want to be viewed simply as a single-mom.  I’m so much more than that! Yet, I pigeon hole myself constantly and it evokes not-so-great feelings in me about myself and about others. 

Although being a single mom creeps into every aspect of my life, I’m working to not allow it to define me.  It’s not easy.  It means not doing things because of despite my single parenthood, but just trying to do things as a mom and a woman, a friend, a neighbor, a daughter, a writer.  It all overlaps but it needs to be sorted out. 

I have to re-categorize myself sometimes multiple times daily.  And I’m working on not being so single-minded.

How do you define yourself?